The Six Girls You’ll Date in College

The Six Girls You’ll Date in College

– This is you in college, and these are the six
girls you’ll date in college. Were you ever good at sports? We don’t know, but the daily 4 AM
burritos haven’t helped. – Aah! Oh.
– You okay? – She looks better in track shorts than literally anything else.
– Come on, baby. You can do it! Ten more yards till touchdown!
– However, no matter what the activity, you’ll always end up the same way: wheezing, doughy, and begging her to slow down. You hate places like this. Never mind. You love places like this.
– I love places like this. – Your friend’s a promoter or DJ, whichever is cooler.
– You’re funny.
– Is there a non-alphabetical difference between E and X? Cut to six weeks later. You’re out of money, too tired, and have no idea what your pants are
made of.
– Wake up. I know the bouncer at Prolapse.
– You wouldn’t give up this nap for all the coked-up sex in the world. Happy dinosaur riding. – Sorry. – Face it. You’re a nice guy.
– Did do you drink all of those beers? – But to her, you’re James Dean with Wolverine claws. It’s fun to play the crazy guy, but
there’s no crazy like real repressed crazy.
– Not tonight? – No.
– Fine.
– The worst part? She’s still going to wake you up for 8 a.m. mass. This is it, the perfect 10, what years of television, print advertising, and internet porn have
taught you–
– Baby, you’re not using the couples wallpaper I gave you. – Why you? She saw a Wes Anderson trailer once and thinks you’re quirky. Who cares? Look at her. How long will it
last? What’s your talents for crippling insecurities and Kesha? You watched Teen Mom without me? You’re just like my dad!
– You’ll keep a picture of her to show to friends. She will not. She’s the only girl who can beat you in Mario Kart. She’s the only girl who will play you in Mario Kart. – Ha, you drive like my floppy vagina!
– Shut up! – Relaxed, comfortable, always by your side. It’s like dating your hoodie, but who in their right mind would want to f–k their hoodie? She’s funny, smart, beautiful, and all you’re doing is wondering what she’s doing there with you. – Is everything okay?
– Yeah.
– Come on. Be confident. You’re not going to mess this up. You won’t mess this up. You won’t mess this up. How did you mess this up?
– We can still be friends, right?
– You were too afraid of messing things up. And that messed things up. Maybe that’s irony. Don’t look at us. You’re the one with a liberal arts degree. That was college. Time to move out, get a job, and spend your days watching internet videos. Maybe you’ll even get a real girlfriend.

Comments (100)

  1. Can I have a Million likes

  2. I want the third or the sixth please

  3. As a medical student.. i dated seven girls in my first year .. i learned there are no such girl you will love truely and study is gone with the existence of girls near you so you fail

  4. Girls I dated in college:

    – The girlfriend I all ready had before I started college.
    – The girl that was senior….. in high school
    – The girl that was too dorky
    – The girl that was not a nice person but had insane blowjobs.

    umh.. pretty much sums everything up.

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  6. IS that ralph the movie maker WE FOUND HIM LADS

  7. The six girls I'll date

    Thanks for reading!

  8. My parents would execute me if i thought of having a girlfriend

  9. You guys are getting girlfriends!?

  10. The video was liked all the way until the end

  11. Haha assuming you date in collegr

  12. This is so damn funny

  13. You guys are getting girlfriends??

  14. well thats pretty much accurate when you aren't ugly . if you are ugly having FBI logo as your profile photo .then its .

  15. No I dont think so

  16. 2:43 Is that a challenge?

  17. The perfect one???
    That hit me?

  18. well this video is all bullshit coz I ain't NEVER EVER dated any of these 6 girls in college

  19. I don’t even have one so figure that out

  20. Edit title:

    *The 6 Girls Chad Will Date In College

  21. I'm in my first year and I'm wondering….

    When will this start because I'm lonely ?

  22. That last one really hits

  23. Jokes on you, I'm alone and suicidal! ?

  24. thats a bold assumption to think i am going to have six girlfriends

  25. joke's on you, I'm a straight female so HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  26. Perfect video. I think I managed all but the sporty one.

  27. Instead if the girls, can I just date Josh?

  28. LMAO i was 9-10 watching shit like this, i didnt even know what porn was until 7th grade. im turning 18 next month

  29. Jokes on you I don't even know 6 girls

  30. Bold of you to assume anyone will date me

  31. So, that was a fucking lie

  32. Awesome…. "gurl-friend"… fur real 😀

  33. Through my entire time, av had 7 & only now av a found the perfect one ?

  34. 0:26 2:11
    0:26 2:11

  35. I clearly should have gone to college just for those 6 girls…I missed out hittin'
    What do I do now.

  36. ok youtube, i finally watched it. stop recommending it.

  37. The six girl i dated in college:
    1. Noone
    2. Noone
    3. Noone
    4. Noone
    5. Noone
    6. Noone

  38. Sees title

    I'm not gay…

    …but both your moms are.

  39. What makes you assume I dont already have a girlfriend

  40. I’m a animation student at mass art. None so far

  41. I doubt I'll even go to college

  42. Been single all my college life until now. 6 more months until I finish college, guess its going to be a wild ride.

  43. That last one hit too hard…

  44. And all 6 of them are hot…

  45. the evolution of comedy where it used to be this but now comedy is all the comments saying "i don't have a girlfriend" lol

  46. I once dated this innocent girl and was more into church. Transformed her into a horny beast ?
    We're no longer together tho

  47. I can see the friend one being more realistic…. no on fucks with dating anymore In this day and age, friends with benefits all the way

  48. Bold of you to assume in gonna go to college

  49. I think you forgot the word never

  50. 7. The one that doesn't exist

  51. The six girls that I dated in college.. wait, I mean ZERO! 🙁

  52. That last one about being too
    Afraid to mess up actually happened to me.

    Still hate myself for it to this day.

  53. I dated the club girl, church girl & hot dumb girl.. there was definitely something WILD but unsettling stirring inside the 'good' church girl!!!

    * My church girl was actually a Catholic school girl. The rumors are sooo true!

  54. Girl 4 is the girl in Oh Bo

  55. 360p ? what is this ? The stone age ?

  56. I study automobile engineering in my clg(ofc) and there is 1 girl in our class.
    Talk about 6

  57. Where's the boyfriend version

  58. Where's the boyfriend version

  59. "So that was a fucking lie"

  60. Why is this just him sexually disappointing six girls

  61. Well yall are wrong I already went through all of these in high school

  62. Wait,you guys are getting dates?

  63. I won’t have six girlfriends in my lifetime

  64. bruh, imagine actually getting A girlfriend

  65. 3 girls i dated in college:
    1) the one from the mental institute
    2) the graffiti writer
    3) the emotionally manipulative one that cheated on me with her ex gf.

    THAT is the difference between lib. arts, and fine arts 2D.

  66. Get a job and spend your days watching internet videos

    You guys are getting paid?

  67. Programmers are not supposed to have girlfriends

  68. Already have a Perfect One. So glad I don't have to worry about dating anymore.

  69. if this really true. Many girls should have already lost their virginity in the west ?

  70. sike: the one that goes to church would ask you to marry her first ?

  71. Is there a mature student version? Asking for a dirty old man friend

  72. the one at the party was the hottest

  73. How tf has this video gotten 106 million views

  74. Bold of you to assume I'll be dating in college

  75. Too bad we have Uni instead of college.

  76. no for me its none

  77. You guys are getting girls

  78. I was supposed to date 6 girls in college!?
    I was fucking CONNED

  79. Man that’s like watching my life story ??

  80. Girlfriends you will date in college
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  81. I would bang the one that goes to church

  82. Those bastards lied to me

  83. I’m just here for the boobs

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