Please welcome this week’s
special guest, Rodney. APPLAUSE So, Miles, what is Rodney to you? This is Rodney. I was so excited
to see him driving my old car that I gave him a cheery honk
and he drove into a hedge. LAUGHTER Heston, what is Rodney to you? This is Rodney. He helped me break the world record for the most sit ups in two minutes. And finally, David,
your relationship with Rodney. This is Rodney and he had
to retrieve my shoe when a drunk man threw it at the skittles
in a bowling alley. LAUGHTER There we are. So, it’s Miles’s distracted driver, it’s Heston’s sit up supporter or David’s bowling buddy. Lee’s team,
where would you like to start? Right, let’s start with Heston.
We’ll start with Heston. This two minute sit up world record, how many did you do? It was 128. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You did more than one a second? Yes. Because I’d been looking at this
for two years before cos I was doing about 3,000 a day. You were doing 3,000 sit ups a day? At first. And that’s still not even
the weirdest thing he’s ever done.
LAUGHTER Can you do a sit up now for us? Actually, I can’t, because
I am having a hip replacement. I’m not surprised, the amount of
sit ups you did in two minutes. What are you going to do
with your old hip? Cos I reckon you should make
a casserole out of it. LAUGHTER So, how did Rodney help
in a sit up session? Well, I needed somebody to spot me. What does that mean? It’s basically somebody making sure
you’re doing the correct sit up – and then counting. – So he’s
like the ref. – Yes. All right, who would
you like to quiz next? OK, we’ll go for Miles. Could you just remind us
of the statement? Driving along, I was very
excited to see my old car, which Rodney was driving,
and I gave a cheery honk and as a result of that,
he steered into a hedge. Did you sell it to him? No, I sold it to a dealership. And then he bought it
off the dealer. Yeah. Where exactly were you? When he went into the hedge? Yes. Cornwall. You saw your old car… Yeah. You don’t know the guy driving it and you think, “Let’s honk at him
cos he’s driving our old car.” Yeah. And he’ll be able to tell
the difference between a cheery honk and a “Get out of the way,
what are you doing, “you crazy fool?”
And a “Oh, that’s our old car!” Or have you got
a selection of honks? Is there, like, an aggressive one
and one that does, you know, Agadoo? In retrospect, it wasn’t
well thought through. No, you’re right. What speed were you going? Well, we would have been going…
It was a windy lane, so probably somewhere in the
region of 35, 40mph. And was he badly injured? No, he wasn’t badly injured,
but he was… He wasn’t as relaxed about
it as he looks now.
LAUGHTER So what happened? Did you then
get out of the car and… Well, I… Yeah, I felt very guilty,
stopped the car and I got out and he went, “What are you
doing?” And I said, “I’m… I’m really
sorry that we honked. “The reason I honked was
because you are… “We… This used to be our car.
You’re driving our old car.” At what point did he say, “But why
have you got a cat’s face on?” LAUGHTER How do you behave if you see a man and he’s going out with a girl that
you used to go out with? We’re not talking about big
numbers here. Well, whatever her nickname was,
we don’t care. LAUGHTER OK, what about David’s statement? You’ll have to remind us, David. He had to retrieve my shoe when a drunk man threw it
at the skittles in a bowling alley. OK, well, first of all, what were you
doing in a bowling alley? Second of all, what were you doing in possession
of your own shoe in a bowling alley? And thirdly, they’re not called
skittles, they’re called pins. – But apart from that,
so far it’s all adding up.
– LAUGHTER Surely your shoe was behind
a counter somewhere. Well, precisely. It was, until
just before it was chucked. Oh, it wasn’t the shoe you
were wearing. It was the one that was in
the bit, that you swapped. I wasn’t currently wearing the shoe. When he threw it, I wasn’t in it. LAUGHTER Was it your bowling shoe that was
thrown or your own shoe? – My own shoe. Your own shoe.
– Who was the guy that threw the shoe? I think his name was Chris. And what year was this? It was the year 2012 AD. So you were… you were… Who was the guy that threw the shoe? – A friend of a friend.
– So what’s he done? – I’m getting my shoe… – Right. – We’re leaving. – OK. – You know, the bowling expedition is coming
to an end, very sad time. LAUGHTER So he’s thrown the skit…
The shoe at the skittle and… It wasn’t just my shoe. – What did he throw?
– There was a group of us and we were all leaving at once
and he was part of the group – but he was sort of enjoying
himself on a different level. – Yeah. LAUGHTER There was… I’d say there was
disagreement in the group as to on what level
life should be lived. And he was on the very much
the heightened, you know… “Tomorrow we may die.” I can imagine you were lobbying
other members of the group to join your level of life enjoyment versus his level of life enjoyment. I was already very disappointed
by the bowling alley’s wine list. LAUGHTER But he, this guy that threw the shoe,
he was having a lovely time. Beer had been drunk. And when some of us were trying
to get our normal life shoes, rather than the magic shoes
of bowling… Do you get up in the morning
and call them – the normal life shoes to start with?
– Absolutely. “Mummy, the normal life shoes
and the normal life vest.” “I think again today, “I shall have the skis of
exceptional invention.” LAUGHTER So the shoes were being handed back
and this guy runs past, snatches three or four shoes. Wow, how many legs have you got? – Oh, the friends’. Sorry. – They’re on
the counter at this point. He chooses his moment – with… Frankly, with the
accuracy of a sober man. – Yes. Runs, and he does it with some
sort of Viking shout of glee, – chucks them towards the…
what I now realise are pins. – Right. You haven’t said what the
occasion was. Erm, it was a stag do. A stag do for one of your chums. For a stranger. I was the stripper.
LAUGHTER No, yes, a friend’s stag do. And how does Rodney
come into the story? He worked at the bowling alley. I think still does and you can’t
just… You can’t just wander down. He went and he walked down one
of the…you know, the gutters. Did he? And retrieved the shoes. So did anything else
happen on this stag night? Did they do anything to the groom? Like tie him to a lamp post, strip
him naked, anything like that? Anyone get a steak
pie down their pants? No, because everyone had
been invited. LAUGHTER All right. Well, we need an answer. So Lee’s team, is Rodney
Miles’s distracted driver, Heston’s sit up supporter or David’s bowling buddy? Well, this is difficult, isn’t it? Because you would have thought that if Heston would have been
that good at sit ups, I feel I would have known that. One of the flaws I see in David’s
story is the idea that there was all their…loads of
their shoes were on the counter and he picked up a load of shoes, whereas when you’re in
a bowling alley and you get your shoes back, there’s
one person giving the shoes back. The flaw I think in David’s argument is the amount of friends
he claims to have. LAUGHTER – I don’t believe Miles’s story.
– You don’t believe Miles at all. You wouldn’t just honk at somebody
driving your old car. EMILIA: No. I thought it
was Heston or David. – You think it’s Heston or David.
You think it’s…? – I think
it’s Heston. So that means that I’m going
to take the mean average and say it’s Heston
and half of David. LAUGHTER So you’re saying that it’s Heston. OK. Rodney, would you please
reveal your true identity? Hi. I’m Rodney and I helped Heston
break the world record for sit ups. APPLAUSE Thanks very much, Rodney.